Tuesday, December 05, 2006

It's Nice That the 'WF' No Longer Stands For We're...um...Screwed.

Hello kids!

I've missed you all. I had to take a break to clean the sarcasm off my keyboard. Oh and to do some really important things at work, like putting prototypes in plastic baggies and sealing them with masking tape, which I believe was the job that Charlie had in Flowers for Algernon at the beginning of he book when he was still retarded and spent the better part of the day peeing on himself and hiding behind the furnace.

The word 'prototype', along with the words 'mutual fund', 'Jarvik 7', or 'having an affair with the Provost', make me sound very mature and important at parties as long as I omit the fact that I'm basically cramming said prototypes into Gladware like they're bits of leftover lasagna. And by 'parties', I mean the evenings when my stuffed dinosaur and I sit on the sofa and watch "Muppet Babies" and wonder why no one ever returns our calls.

Until tomorrow, enjoy this graphic I did to commemmorate my alma mater Wake Forest's upcoming Orange Bowl appearance. We had a horrible football team when I was in school. We considered it a victory if we beat the spread. Hell, some guys (we'll call them Lambda Chi's) rolled the Quad if they beat off.

Come for the literary references. Stay for the masturbation jokes.

See you Wednesday.

1 comment:

August said...

Don't you mean 'cum' for the literary refs.? I wouldn't call "F.F. Algernon" literature but rather a 'classic' annoyance our society puts up with. It's about a 'tard for chrissakes. But the parallels drawn aren't lost on me dear writer.

I thought maybe you decided to end it all after posting that NKOTB video, realizing the horror you'd unleashed. Glad it was just a 'vacation'.

Hey where is my Kinko stock copy of Jesus saying "God I hate it when they combine . . . ."? Or was that a joke too?