Wednesday, July 23, 2008

R.I.P. Mrs. Petrillo

I was disappointed that today was not declared a National Day of Mourning so we could collectively grieve the loss of Estelle Getty. While co-starring on The Golden Girls*--the best thing to hit the Lifetime Network since Midol ads--Mrs. Getty was responsible for popularizing the word "lanai", for delivering zingers like "Fasten your seatbelt, slutpuppy, this ain't gonna be no cakewalk!", and for giving my former college roommate and I the inspiration to create a drinking game** responsible for more than one absence from our Theatre Design class and, quite possibly, rendering us unfit to be organ donors.

So while we all may express our sadness in our own way--I'll be pouring a can of Ensure out in her honor--I don't understand why her passing resulted in a spike in site traffic because of this Yahoo search:
For the past 24 hours, a disturbing number of people have been asking questions about Estelle's ovaries, a search string that has led them here. So, um, welcome new readers with a somewhat morbid interest in the reproductive organs of a now-late character actress...

* If you don't enjoy The Golden Girls, I would appreciate if you and the dark angels in your soul would please stay away from me and my unfettered love for Rose Nylund.

** I know I've written about this before but to play said game, participants are required to drink for each of the following: Every time Rose mentions St. Olaf; Every time Dorothy says something sarcastic; Every time Blanche says something sexual; Every time Sophia mentions Sicily and as AN ADDED LIVER-SHATTERING BONUS, you drink twice if Sophia calls Dorothy "Pussycat." You should keep enough liquor on hand to kill an apatosaurus and also be prepared to perform your own blood transfusion***.

***Actually you should probably just put a plastic bucket beside the sectional sofa, just in case Blanche delivers a heartfelt, hot-flashin' monologue about devirginizing a military cadet named Huckleberry beneath a magnolia tree on Big Daddy's sugar cane plantation.

23 comments:

Jim Gerl said...

Hi,

I just voted for your excellent blog for Bloggers Choice Awards.

Could you please return the favor at:

http://www.bloggerschoiceawards.
com/blogs/show/21620

Thanks,

SpEdLaw2

yoritomo said...

When you footnote your footnotes you know you have reached a pinnacle of postmodernist achievement. Congratulations.

Phil said...

Hey, maybe it was that charming spammer Jim Gerl above. He keeps leaving all his comments on 20SB blogs and I wouldn't be surprised if he's into searching online for ovaries.

For my part, I'm proud to report that even though I was never allowed to watch TV growing up, I've been up late watching TV while back in Albuquerque, and I regularly watch the Golden Girls. I can't help myself, they crack me up.

Gilahi said...

One of the best lines ever delivered on TV was when the GG were trying to come up with a theme song for Miami. Rose wanted to use the word "thrice", Dorothy said that nobody says "thrice". Rose says, "it's a word", and Dorothy zings back with "So is intrauterine!" Then Rose comes up with:

Miami, you're cuter'n
an intrauterine...

Riotous.

The Clandestine Samurai said...

Man, I didn't even know she passed. My condolences for her and her ovaries. And yours if you've played that game for each episode.

Ben said...

Ummmmm...HOW is that search thread bringing them here? Be honest now, DID you post about her ovaries? You did, didn't you...

Essentially Me said...

What I don't understand is how she died before any of the other golden girls. Wasn't she the 'baby' of the group?? Not that that matters.

The Golden Girls rocked my weekdays as a kid.

notsojenny said...

interesting... i always credited Blanche with the popularity of "lanai". i stick to my guns on this one.

but i was so bummed to hear about this. i get 2hrs of GG each day i work from home and it's By Far one of my favorite things about working from home.
not that we're sharing favorite episodes, but whenever i think of GG i hear the battle hymn "over there" in my head (gosh i hope you get that tie in or else i just sound stupid)

Sarah Elizabeth said...

What an interesting search lead to your page! I am definitely trying that drinking game, in Mrs. Petrillo's honor!

BTWs, I tagged you on my blog with the the Brillante Award! Pass it on!

Jenn N Butter said...

I loved the Golden Girls. When they are up singing Mr. Sandman to the baby in their bathrobes I just about died. You remind me of Estelle Getty actually. Funny in a sarcastic way...huh very interesting.

Jenn

J-Money said...

jim gerl: Unless I write a blog about Special Ed law, no you didn't. I looked you up and you seem to have only repeatedly voted for yourself. So take your spam and your blog and go serve yourself a dick. Kthxbai.

yoritomo: Yes, I am spectacular.

phil: Me too. I have yet to see an episode that doesn't make me laugh at least once. And if that makes me wrong...

gilahi: I still like the one about St. Olaf's festival with the headless boy.

clandestine samurai: My ovaries don't serve a purpose, apparently. In fact, I'm thinking of renting them out.

ben: Absolutely not! I wrote about her uterus.

essentially me: I think so. I know that she was younger than Bea Arthur. But then again, so is Israel.

notsojenny: Just for that, you are now welcome to work from my home.

sarah elizabeth: Seriously? I like you so much.

jenn n butter: That may be the greatest compliment I've ever received.

Maria said...

I love Estelle, but I certainly don't care about her ovaries. And about the Ensure thing? I intend to do the same.

Julia said...

Ha! That drinking game sounds awesome.

Too bad the only person I know who watches the GG besides me is.. my grandma. I wonder if she'll be down for it?

Jenn N Butter said...

Your Welcome!

Jenn

P.S. I mentioned you briefly on last nights post. You can find it here:

http://fatgirlrunning-dragonscapes24.blogspot.com/2008/07/easily-amused.html

My Life My Life My Life said...

I'm almost tempted to do a search JUST to see what they brought up...

I love Golden Girls. My favorite is Blanche though. The freak nasty drama queen was just to funny when she got lesbian mixed up with the word Lebanese...

Captain Steve said...

Sophia was my favorite. I loved the episode where they found out that Rose was a bit of a trollop! Excellent drinking game. That shall be part of my next birthday extravaganza, because someone has to sleep in the bathroom, or it's just not a party.

brandy said...

A Gold Girls drinking game? Dear Lord. How did I ever live without this? There's a GG marathon this weekend and I need to go stock up on some hard liquor. Thanks for sharing this game! I thank you, but my liver probably does not.

rs27 said...

wait wait, you could say slutpuppy on NBC?

those were the days.

Xenia said...

Search words--so unbelievably disturbing. People are just f*cked up. You'd think they'd be googling for the state of Blanche's ovaries.

Movie Maven said...

Our version of the drinking game included almost identical rules to yours, but also included the following "drink if"s:
- every time the Girls are shown wearing pajamas
- every time they eat cheesecake
- every time Dorothy has a Withering Glance Reaction Shot

Suffice it to say, we tried it once and everyone died of alcohol poisoning.

Later*, we had a theme party in which everyone had to dress as their favorite Girl. My roommate and I were the only ones who did it**, except for one attendee wearing a Bea Arthur t-shirt.

*Later being approx. 4 months ago. I am 27 years old. And single.
**a black polyester/blue lame jumpsuit pour moi a la Deveraux, a drapey grey sparkly thing for my roomie, a la Zbornak.

Meeks said...

1. GG drinking game = best idea of all time. Perhaps in the interest of my liver, I'll make it a cheesecake eating game. That oughta be pretty.
2. I just added to the Estelle/ovary searches because I didn't bookmark your site when I found it yesterday and that's what stuck out in my brain. My bad.
3. Love the writing!

Matt said...

Ummm...

If it shows that someone searched for "ovaries" on your blog...

it wasn't me.

and if it shows that it was me...

it was purely in the name of science.

**Melissa** said...

Isn't it funny all the random searches people do?